<Ghost> wot I still dont get about hl2 is they can open a portal to another universe but they can't make a flashlight that lasts more then 5 mins

<Daresay> Aussies vs. Canadians
<Daresay> Who wins?
<zere> aussie vs anyone
<zere> aussie wins
<videogameaholic> one aussie could take over canada
<zere> i seen an australian guy get shot by a tank
<Daresay> It's always the same countries fighting on tv
<zere> he got hit in the shoulder
<zere> it only slowed him down
<zere> he ran up to the tank
<zere> bent the barrel back
<zere> ripped the cover off
<videogameaholic> I think that was the movie The Hulk
<Daresay> Hahaha
<zere> oh

<Kaie> asian people from asia .. can speak better enlgish then american born black folks
* onceler inserts the word "some" between then & american
* Kaie earases some and inserts most
* Plow crosses out then and puts "than"
<Kaie> ok enough of the grammer .. anyone agree?
* Morgoth crosses out people and puts in "robots"

bpt87ocg: i guess if i'm 40% slut while a german, i'll be more slutty later on...
bpt87ocg: err
bpt87ocg: virgin
bpt87ocg: wtf

<Sloth> I used to keep a bottle of listerine in my bathroom for girls to use after they gave me oral pleasure
<Sardaukar> what a considerate guy
<Sardaukar> is the bottle still full?

<WBill|FujiP> `java
<rewt> <Alanna> Saying that Java is nice because it works on all OS's is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all genders

(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) I just told my GF i'm a pedophilian
(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) and she's like
(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) OMFG
(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) YOU FUCKING SICK GUY
(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) :<:<:<:<:<:<:<
(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) rofllolshitfuckGODDAMNfuckingfuckfucker
(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) I just like to set things on fire
(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) rofl
(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) and then she leaves me
(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) :<
(YoyoYoYo) ROFL
(YoyoYoYo) YOU IDIOT
(YoyoYoYo) Pedophilia = like to fuck kids
(YoyoYoYo) Pyromania = Liking to set things on fire
(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) omfg
(@Obi-Wan-Condomi) bastard

-20:06:10- [][nfern0]: Rizzy
-20:06:10- [@Rizzy]: ][nfern0
-20:06:10- [][nfern0]: r
-20:06:12- [][nfern0]: gh3y
-20:06:14- [Limey]: lol
-20:06:17- [@Rizzy]: LOL
-20:06:18- [@Heartwork]: lol
-20:06:24- [@Heartwork]: that backfired a little, infeh :D

<krazy> Have any of you weighed yourselves before and after you shit?
<Wanderer> ... Why would we want to know how much our shit weighed?
<krazy> Well, it's helped me prove that, despite everyone's claims, I'm not full of shit.

<@Bad-Co> [Muttley]: do you have to pull the teeth on the sheep before they blow you ??
<@[Muttley]> I dunno, ask Sonic
<@Bad-Co> ok. SonicSamurai, does [Muttley] have to pull the teeth on sheep before they blow him ??
<@SonicSamurai> yes, he does
<@Bad-Co> k ta

(@Sens|around) my hair will grow longer soon.. ;P
-> nick: (Sens|around) is now known as (Sens|UT)
(@skip) hmm
(@skip) you have short hair?
(@Euph) she doesnt have any? :|
(@Crouton) bald?
(@skip) shaved?
(@Crouton) waxed?
(@skip) peeled out one by one with bear hands?
(@Crouton) imac'd?
(@skip) penisslapped?
(@Crouton) blow tourched?
(@skip) chainsawed?
(@Crouton) garden scissored?
(@Messa) sandpapered?
(@Crouton) angle grinded?
(@skip) used as mousemat?
(@Sens|UT) no, long hair

<WarrioR> The Weakest Link is fascinating program. They ask a bunch of people questions and they keep getting rid of the dumbest person, so just the smartest person is left. It is kind of the opposite way we elect our government. :(

<@KrayWolf> Microsoft Windows: A thirty-two bit extension and graphical shell to a sixteen-bit patch to an eight-bit operating system originally coded for a four-bit microprocessor which was written by a two-bit company that can't stand one bit of competition.

<Maggie> Rune
<Rune> ?
<Maggie> why are all men chauvinistic pigs?
<Rune> because we're better than you

(Blood_God): gah fs...
(Blood_God): where'd i put my other fan mounting screws :S
*** Joins: maRto
(maRto): #trickery.radio
(maRto): woops
(Blood_God): nope..
(Blood_God): they're not in there

(Heartwork`) i'm looking for a uni book
(onions) uni for dummies? it got republished, its called college now
(onions) bwaaaaahhaahhahahaaaaa

<hokers> hey Davo I found a quote from you on some IRC quotes site
<Davo> coolz
<Davo> lets see it
<hokers> something about havnig a toy ray gun up your arse?
<Davo> heh
<Davo> www.i-rox.com
<hokers> thats the one
<fastest> he stole that from ME! :@
<hokers> please tell me you were kidding...
<Mutor> u two share arse-ray-guns?
<Davo> theres just the one gun
<Mutor> omg

[22:12] <Kahuna> goin skiing in Vietnam with a group of football hooligans...the advert said come hit the Slopes
[22:12] <`oZ> they dont have snow in vietnam
[22:12] <Kahuna> fs

(SoliD[mmm]): omg
(SoliD[mmm]): mcdaniel is a freak
(SoliD[mmm]): McD : Laptop says:
(SoliD[mmm]): hmm just found a point on my arse where if i scratch i need a pee
(SoliD[mmm]): McD : Laptop says:
(SoliD[mmm]): feels nice in a wierd way
(SoliD[mmm]): McD : Laptop says:
(SoliD[mmm]): woah need to shit now too
(Dw2k): wtf O_o

<LadyAerowen> I'm allowed to have my own opinion, burra :P
<burrahobbit> i dont know where you got that idea from but it is wrong

<FluffyKitten> one of my kids spent one night in bed with his mother, and the next night in bed with his sister...

<Deviant`> get your internet gramma right
<Razorflu> Grammar, Deviant, it is spelt Gramma
<Razorflu> Grammar*

<SylverFyre> smoke n bed - nn all
<Jolene> nn
<BBW> nn
* Jolene gives SylverFyre a tissue :/
<SylverFyre> lol
<SylverFyre> smoke - not stroke ;)

(+TheGuyver): missus pulled off the digi cam from on top of my monitor, sissors flew off with them and opened mid air and was 2mm from my ball bag :/
(+TheGuyver): landed 2mm from my ball bag
(+TheGuyver): its peirced the leather chair :/
(Silkeh): fully awake now then?

<`Pesmerga> o-m-g
<`Pesmerga> that was so close
<`Pesmerga> I was doing something not so agreeable
<`Pesmerga> and then decided to pull my pants back up because i heard something
<`Pesmerga> and then right when i was all covered up
<`Pesmerga> parents walk in
<`Pesmerga> hi mom...

<BlackIsle> u know the fit lass who works behind the counter?
<Heartwork`> she's probably jewish, so i probably do.
* Wilco- has joined #trickery
<Heartwork`> my current bird is jewish
<BlackIsle> ma flat m8 is seeing her atm ;)
<Wilco-> well thats an interesting 2 lines to join at

<wfs|Pringles[r]> i just bought HL2 of my mate, but its saying i cant use it online because of cd-key duplicate :x , how do i fix this so i can register it on my account ? thanks in advance for any help ^^

<FluffyKitten> thanks to whoever edited my quote about kids sleeping in their parents beds in the Sims and put it on i-rox... I now have some probable wannabe vigilante PMing me asking me what I meant by it.

<Razorhl2> oh shit, she has no head :s
<Razorhl2> and she is competing the Olypmics, amazing
<theGreenBunny> ...
<Razorhl2> and if that isn't the oddest thing you've read in irc, i don't know what is
<theGreenBunny> my sarcasm detector isn't clear on those two lines
<Thargore> oh, a sarcasm detector, REAL USEFULL
<Razorhl2> lol
<theGreenBunny> beep
<slinter> beep beep

<Davo^> britney spears is arse
<Davo^> she isnt even fapping material
<Davo^> she's skank
<Pesmerga> I'd fuck her
<Davo^> i wouldnt even slap her with YOUR penis
<Pesmerga> Davo^: I wouldn't let you slap her with my penis
<Pesmerga> let alone have your hands on it
<Pesmerga> your AIDS infected hands
<Davo^> the thought of a guy holding your immense penis, while slapping it around a bit on Britneys chin makes you prematurely ejaculate from your penile erectile
* Pesmerga shudders

<@Kangy> ME is like some weird anti-christ edition.
<@Kangy> Or the possesed girl from The Exorcist.
<@Kangy> She's okay at first, but then her head starts turning, and she comes up with error messages about your mother sucking dicks in hell.

@col`Linus > omg german tv sucks
@col`Linus > show on atm: MTV's Rock Zone
@col`Linus > first song playing
@col`Linus > BRITNEY SPEARS - TOXIC
@col`Linus > OMFG
@col`Lee > thats not rock
@col`Linus > now its the fucking sugar babes
@col`Linus > thats why german tv sucks
@col`Linus > i hate germany....

<daisy> is that really ur name??
<popleinski> what popleinskiovich?
<daisy> yer
<popleinski> yes it was my familys name before we moved to england in 1998
<daisy> y u change it tho?? i didnt think u cud change names
<popleinski> to sound more english
<daisy> what country were u born in then?
<popleinski> poland. lived there til i was 10.
<daisy> rite
<popleinski> errr u knew me quite well in infant school and i think in playschool too
<daisy> oh
<daisy> shut up!

<FluffyKitten> I don't drink, so getting drunk is out... yet dispite that fact my sister bought me a bottle of wine
<PZYCOMAN> Drunk people are fun. Theyr suprisingly easy to tie to lampposts and put upside down in rubbish bins
<chippy|> hmm, dont drink, dont smoke, what doyoudo?
<chippy|> have lots of sex
<FluffyKitten> I don't do that either... bar the obvious reason of "lack of victims", there's babies and sex germs out there... scary.

<Davo^> so there i was, checking out some porn. upon closer inspection, i noticed one particular picture had a tv, vcr player + videos in the background. one of the videos put me off the mood, i could distinctly see the face and cheesy, smug smile of alan patridge in the background
<Davo^> and all i could think about was his catchphrase, "ah haaaaaa!"
<Davo^> i laughed
<Davo^> and most men know how hard it is to fap when you're laughing
<Davo^> ... lo?

(+^3LgAeD) whats plan tonite Kryton
(+Kryton) god knows m8
(+Kryton) i need a shag im pissed off
(+Kryton) bah miss our luke :<
(+Kryton) pissin me off good style
(+^3LgAeD) rofl
(+^3LgAeD) thgat sounded bad
(+^3LgAeD) <Kryton> i need a shag im pissed off
(+^3LgAeD) <Kryton> bah miss our luke :<
(+Kryton) er

[ @Audun ] bah
[ @Audun ] I reckon my router has some hardware fault
[ @IceY` ] smash it against the wall
[ @IceY` ] then u will know
[ @IceY` ] :P

* Mekanikos is now known as Meka|WoW
<fruitbat> is that when you paint w's on your arse cheeks and bend over?

<Daney> great minds think alike!!!
<RiN> indeeed
<RiN> so why do we?
<Daney> dunno

Grotw8: whats strong enough for a man but built for a woman?
Grotw8: the back of my hand

<dan> this one dude made a raytraced monopoly board, and it looked just like a photo!
<GreenPenInc> url?
<dan> i forget =[
<GreenPenInc> ok I'll find it
<GreenPenInc> ...heh
<GreenPenInc> i'm googling for monopoly and all I get is people bitching about microsoft :D

<lifeless> not that i need it cause i've got STATIC ips :D
<fruitbat> heh
* fruitbat shrugs
<fruitbat> just means lifeless is an easier to track target
<lifeless> lol
<lifeless> sure
<lifeless> go try it :P
<fruitbat> just tell some big irc chaneels that his ip is a server for porn
<fruitbat> BOOM
<lifeless> lol
<fruitbat> your internet connection explodes
<fruitbat> as a million rabid geeks hit it
<fruitbat> :D

<Coda> I am geek, hear me .RAR

fruitbat | http://www.i-rox.com/quote/1993
|Ryan| | lol that realy long 1 is gd
fruitbat | yeah
|Ryan| | wat a complete idiot
|Ryan| | they dont deserve a comp
fruitbat | yip
fruitbat | hey ryan can you check to see if you have all the rights in this channel?
fruitbat | run this : /server rights
* |Ryan| has quit ()
fruitbat | hahahhahahahhahahahahahaha
* fruitbat is cruel

<Ben> shaggy, what were you thinking when you drank tire sealant?
<@ShaggyShaggs> the bottle said nontoxic

{@u96d-roo} i'm wearing a qpad wristband
{@_voo} rofl
{@_voo} nerd
{@engii} QUIT MESSAGE
{@_voo} loloolollool
{@u96d-roo} I have reached a all low friday night peak

(@outpost) what if they took all the fudgesickles in the world and formed a new continent with them
(@outpost) It could be called Fugeatopia
(@Spudlet) I would say " didnt see that coming "
(@Hazar-) :D
(@Spudlet) then poop on the ground
(@Spudlet) no one would know

<Deviant`> what was that song that was on the windows 95 cd?
<Pi|Mu|Rho> video?
<Deviant`> the one with the girl singing in chicago
<Deviant`> yeah
<zofrex> it was "buffy holly"
<DizzyOne> crash me baby on more time?

<ZoFreX> \\o
<ZoFreX> o//
<ZoFreX> _o/
<ZoFreX> \o_
<Varsity> That's sephamore for "fuck" btw
<ZoFreX> o_O
<ZoFreX> whoops

[+coldplasma] anyone who uses IRC, bar me, is not attractive
[+coldplasma] im so attractive, i sometimes fancy myself
[@neoflame] that would make you homosexual, coldplasma
[@neoflame] are you a homosexual?
[+coldplasma] wanking is having sex with yourself, but youre not homo, are you neoflame?
[@neoflame] lol