[+lr-saito^drunk] 10 bucks says
[+lr-saito^drunk] lr can beat his team with no 100a pick ups
[+coldplasma] 10 bucks says your team cant bet over the irc network

<The-Jedi-Farmer> Dude , get laid
<Kryton> i did \o/
<Kryton> yesterday \o/
<Sierro> incest is wrong Kryton

[Easy-Kill]: it might be boring .. but ur a cunt
[@Mystic_Magic]: well IMO ur all cunts, so shut up now pls
[+Relman]: atleast a cunts useful

[@gR-]: anyone know how to make mpg fast forward in media player?
[@gR-]: as it just keeps maing me watch it all the way thru
[@gR-]: i cant skip thru anything
[@[RiCoChEt]]: close your eyes, then open them
[@[RiCoChEt]]: !

(skatevans) is this like the live forum for halflife2.net
(@SidewinderX) kinda
(@SidewinderX) but there's alot more gay sex here
(skatevans) i guess im in the right place

<LOLMAN-> TEHRE APPEARS TO BE AN AIMBOTTAR ON TEH LOLMAN SERVAR :<
<LOLMAN-> NAEM IS "BUMMER", SO ITS POSSIBLE TAHT HE LIKES ANAL
<limited> OMFG RAELLY!
<LOLMAN-> THUOGH I REALIESE THAT IS IRRELEVANT
<LOLMAN-> BAN ASAP
<limited> NICKLAME?!
<LOLMAN-> NO HES BOTTIGN :E
<limited> NICKNAME?
<LOLMAN-> BUMMER
<limited> BANNZ0RED!!!1!
<LOLMAN-> HE LEFT :F
<LOLMAN-> OHH RITE
<LOLMAN-> LEET :DDD
<LOLMAN-> THANX MAN
<limited> np ;)
<LOLMAN-> OHH MAN, TEHRES SOEM OTHAR LAEMER NOW, TAEMKILLING EVARYONE
<LOLMAN-> NICKNAME IS "LOLMAN"
<LOLMAN-> :DDDDDDD
<limited> AHR AHR!

([Matt]): think i was watching tommy cooper on live TV when he died....
([Matt]): was only about 4 or 5 i think
(Marik): how he die?
(Pi|Mu|Rho): just like that.

{@pleh} they said i dropped my soap :/
{@_jon} ;(
{@_voo} i bet you did
{@_voo} didnt you
{@_voo} on purpose
{@pleh} yeah
{@_voo} then they blocked all the plug holes
{@_voo} so you could lick the cum
{@_voo} from the floor
{@pleh} i like it when i get bummed by 10 horny niggers
{@_voo} like a dirty hoover

--- join: D33
<D33> hello
<D33> i'm on the toilet right now, using a laptop/mobile combo
<D33> i am, as of right now
<D33> having a poo on irc
<D33> rox \o/
--- quits: D33 (Ping Timeout)

<Pciber> I just thought of the most awesome AIDS campain slogan.
<Pciber> AIDS Kills, We ain't fucking around!

<Kiz> can i get voice because im a girl?
<traesko> Kiz: why would you get voice just cause your a girl? Do you know what century it is?

<@Bard`> im off to iron
<@Bard`> :(
<@tom`> is that near iran?

* qui is away: pub
(Marik) again?!
( (DJCarlos) its short for public toilets :P
(DJCarlos) :o
(Marik) lol
(Rizlib|Maid_dut) lol

[Deviant] Last week i walked in my computing class and got asked "Why are you late?"
[Deviant] So I just said "I had my legs amputated" and walked across the room sat down and got my stuff out
[Deviant] I looked up and everyone was looking at me so I said "what? I got better..."

(@Heartwork) lol Kryton
(@Heartwork) you remember i was telling you about that artist Dick Black who shows up on the computers system where I work as Black Dick? He's got an album called 'A Taste Of'. I nearly pissed myself laughing.
(Kryton) er
* @Heartwork gets caot
(@Heartwork) coat
(Kryton) u work as a black dick?

(Adonis-) does ne1 even take notice of me? :(
(Togra) no, we can't see your text
(Adonis-) really? How do I make it so u can see it Togra?
(+Dalamari) type /nick Banme
:::: Nick: Adonis- : [ Banme ]
(Banme) can u see me now!?
(+Dalamari) Nope
(Banme) doh
(Banme) how come?
(@Spudalicious) My god banme
(@Spudalicious) How can they respond to your text if they cant see it
(@Spudalicious) Ofcourse they can see it, they are responding to it

<@Bliink> jeez.. i'm suck a nerd :P
<@Bliink> lol
<@TDE246> lol
<@TDE246> you suck a nerd?
<@Bliink> shit!

<@atomic> I've suspected for some time now that my girlfriend has been having an affair. The usual signs. Phone rings, I answer, someone hangs up. She started going out 'with the girls' a lot recently although when I ask which girls it is always "Just some friends from work, you don't know them". I always look out for her taxi coming home but she always walks down the drive although I can hear a car setting off.
<@atomic> As if she has got out of the car round the corner. Why? Is it not a taxi? I once picked her mobile up just to see what time it was and she went beserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I checking up on her.
<@atomic> Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my g/f. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth but last night she went out again and I decided to check on her. I decided I was going to hide behind my car which would give me a view of the whole street so I could see which car she gets out of. It was whilst crouched behind my car that I noticed rust around my rear wheel arch.
<@atomic> Should I take it into a body repair shop or should I buy some stuff from the local auto shop and try to repair it myself?

<awayonesty> I cant stand the chicks that speak like that
<awayonesty> trashy little armadale skanks
<awayonesty> "who da der"
<awayonesty> "y dat"
<awayonesty> "yeh i godda get da bus to da yoof centa"
<awayonesty> So fuckin tacky
<awayonesty> I mean, net slang.. by all means
<awayonesty> But not skank slang
<awayonesty> !@
<awayonesty> /whinge

<Brain_Murders> thats the worst thing about piles - I used to spend hours with a crayon up my arse doing pictures for friends and family

<D33> How would someone react if their nipples exploded
<D33> i have no idea why that popped into my head

Marik: I havea problem
Marik: SOme girl
Marik: online on msn on the web-cam
ophiuchus: ???
Marik: Said if you take off your top i'll take mine off!
ophiuchus: again???
Marik: waht fdo i do?
ophiuchus: do you want her to take her top off?
Marik: Same girl
Marik: YES!
ophiuchus: then do it damnit

<kalakk0> fucktard sounds like something from mario bros
<DreamThrall> wtf no it doesn't lol
<Dalamari> wtf mario bros did you play?
<Dalamari> Hey Mario, go fuck yourself
<Dalamari> LUIGI I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL RIP YOUR BALLS OFF AND EAT THEM

(@Bard``) what did one computer say to the other
(@Bard``) 10011011001110101101101001111110001111
(@tom`) why am i laughing?
(@Bard``) Lol
(+Brawn) heh

<rolw> I think Steam is the single worst idea that any software company ever had
<@Pi|Mu|Rho> but not quite as bad as the idea your parents had...

<benja> A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question
asked was:"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the
food shortage in the rest of the world?"
<benja> The survey was a huge failure...
<benja> In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant.
<benja> In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant.
<benja> In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant.
<benja> In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant.
<benja> In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant.
<benja> In South America they didn't know what "please" meant.
<benja> And in the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant

<ProfLiebstrom> D33 go to the doctor you nub
<ProfLiebstrom> D33 just go to the doctor
<ProfLiebstrom> if you die we have no one to poke fun at :(
<D33> I can't die, ProfLiebstrom.
<ProfLiebstrom> you can
<D33> I've been training a midget that looks rather similar to me, to take over my life and adopt my rather random, slightly negative, feces-orientated attitude should something happen to me.
<D33> I call him.... Mini 3.

<Rizzy> Yea, just say '/quit it you bunch of slags' and they will soon shut up xD
* Quit? (<zedi-Dimension>) (~enzo@enz0-gaming.users.quakenet.org) (it you bunch of slags)
<Rizzy> ROFL

[@coldplasma] d-_-b
[+hunt3r] how do you do that inverted 'b' ?
[+hunt3r] wait
[+hunt3r] Nevermind

[14:48] <Pi|Mu|Rho> bollocks bollocks arse fuck wank shit cunt twat
[14:48] <TDE989892> said the nun when she stubbed her toe on the altar

<affa> Joe?
<Joe> yeah
<affa> Why are you downloading films of people taking a dump that I downloaded from you?

<Rachel> 15. Mycophobia is the fear of?
<Vaen> MY COCK
<Skylar> small things
<Vaen> fuck you

JstWnnaHveFuN08: do you think i should call a guy friend and talk to him about my problems? or will he not care?
Thilo: Here's how it works: if a guy helps you with your problems, you're obligated to give him a blowjob.
JstWnnaHveFuN08: lol thanks that cheered me up
Thilo: No problem. That'll be one blowjob please.

nick: (bliv`lotrbfme) is now known as (bliv`)
(@Kryton`) lord of the rings butt fucked me?

<@Terror> "It's easy to forget what a sin is in the middle of a battlefield."
<@cky> opposite over hypotenuse
<@cky> dipshit

<Asmodai> I spy with my little eye something beginning with ([a-zA-Z0-9].*)

<@Ember> should i ask jonny this---
<@Ember> ok so i know we haven't known each other for long and I really shouldn't be asking you for this..... but I want it so bad don't get me wrong it's just that I haven't had it for a long time I could already feel it going in so hard and coming out so soft and wet. No one has to know about this, I'm desperate, but your help can be very grateful!!!
<@Ember> you must think I have a lot of nerve asking you for this but I can feel my tongue around it sucking all the juice out until there no more left, this has been on my mind all day long and I hope I'm not being forward but.... can I have a piece of gum?
<+Sarah> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

<hat> Dalamari; ever seen a 11" cock?
<hat> i don't think so
<Dalamari> hat: yeah, sticking out from my torso into your ass
<Thargore> lol
<Dalamari> pelvis even
<shenk> LOL
<Thargore> hahaha
<shenk> Dalamari nice mate
<Thargore> see a doctor, Dalamari

(D33) Has anyone ever wiped their arse then carefully moved one leg up and pulled the tissue out to take a look at the contents ?
(D33) I did it once and saw the batman callsign

<SM|OLE_Its_Xmas> ive done it again
<SM|OLE_Its_Xmas> checked weather.co.uk to see if its raining
<skip> \o/
<SM|OLE_Its_Xmas> instead of looking out the window :(

<amok1> i finally ventured outside
<Red7> Were you mugged?
<amok1> nope
<Red7> Last time I went outside, I was mugged, now I stay in the house all day in my pillow fort, where I'm safe

<@ComradeBadger> why the fuck would anyone buy me nail scissors, nail clippers and EYEBROW TWEEZERS!
<@TDEmerry_x-mas> lol
<@ComradeBadger> stupid insane relatives
<@TDEmerry_x-mas> maybe hinting that you need to cut your nails and trim your eyebrows?
<@Bliink> hehe
<@ComradeBadger> :O
<@ComradeBadger> they barely see me
<@ComradeBadger> in fact i don't think i can remember seeing them
<@Bliink> well, not behind all that eyebrow hair you dont..

<@ComradeBadger> btw people the panto went ok
<@TDEmerry_x-mas> what panto?
<@ComradeBadger> my sixth form panto
<@TDEmerry_x-mas> what was it a panto of?
<@ComradeBadger> Peter Pan: the Directors Cut
<@TDEmerry_x-mas> ahh hehe
* @TDEmerry_x-mas wonders what badger did with the fairy

<Murray> Well, lesson for you, buddy: Don't copy/paste shit from iliterates
<Master`BB> from what?
<Murray> ...never mind

(Davo^): ...so i was using my toy gun as anal penetration, but i forgot to take the batteries out. you know what i did? i just went with the flow, that will be the first and last time i hear "destroy him, my robots" coming from my hairy ass

<z0manifest> Hey do think Texting language could be the nxt language of the world?
<onions> no
<z0manifest> hey do u ? txting lang cld be the nxt lang of the world? :p
<z0manifest> translated
<onions> no
<z0manifest> aw
* z0manifest sighs
<Di0XiDe> if it did I would have to become a homocidal maniac
<Jordan> Me too
<onions> and i'd have every mobile fitted with some c4 i can detonate at my own will
<`oZ> lol
<onions> "hello? yeah i'm on the train. no we haven't started moving yet. see you soo.."BANG!
<`oZ> lol

[+Distortional] what a fagtard
[@neoflame] idd
[+Distortional] idd
[+[APOTA]AiRHeaD`] lmao !
[+Distortional] has he not noticed my nick backwards spells AIMBOTTER
[@neoflame] lol
[@neoflame] idd
[@neoflame] all of the #ut ops are fags
[+Distortional] idd
[@joepjens] they are fags and lick epics ass
[@neoflame] idd
[+lr-saito] I never got the point of chans where everybody mindlessly agrees with each other :|
[@neoflame] lolz idd saito

<Xen0m0rph> doom 3 isn't a good resource manager, is it ?
<+viper> no, doom 3 is a game

(Mitoboy): What does "ginger" mean?
(Heartwork): ginger hair
(Pi|Mu|Rho): red-haired
(Pi|Mu|Rho): freakish
(Pi|Mu|Rho): genetic oddity
(Pi|Mu|Rho): subhuman
(Heartwork): intron
(Pi|Mu|Rho): onions

<DarkNeo> Tips on what NEVER to say:
<DarkNeo> When you wife/gf asks you if her pants her look fat
<DarkNeo> NEVER and I repeat NEVER tell her it's probably not the pants